Feeling down and out? Worn too thin? Over worked? Unappreciated? Trying to build a career as a millennial is not without its perks. So, if you are feeling undervalued, underpaid, even cheated by the circumstances of economics, here are 6 sliver linings to financial floundering.
1. 20 years from now you can be an intolerable martyr:
You’ll be able to assume a distant look of past pain, and recollect to your children, or your children’s children, the weeks you were so broke you were unable to pay for your iPhone data; “Do you know what kind of effect that has on your Instagram account? People went weeks not knowing that my rose made me feel #blessed”
2. The food:
Don’t deny it, you love instant noodles, everyone does, and there’s no reason to feel guilty! Ramen noodles? Yes please! Five dollar KFC bucket! Definitely! Pasta from a tin? You bet your ass! So sit in your dark apartment on the couch you picked up outside the retirement home, and eat those microwaved sodium bowls, you’re saving money, b*tch!
3. It’s not your fault your job sucks:
Feeling awkward when you run into people from high school and they ask you what you’re up to? Don’t want to tell them that you clean the small animal enclosures at a lab, or brag about your recent promotion from stocking to cashiering? Try this; look at the ground and shake your head, take a deep breath and say one simple phrase as you shrug “damn student loans, man”.
The exasperated sentence; “I have a degree, I studied in school! Why can’t I get a good job?!” Almost always gets you a free meal from your family and loved ones. But it’s more than just food, think outside the box, why not mooch off their air conditioning, internet, and Netflix account!
Hungry for lunch? No need to whip out your wallet, you can just troll the aisles of Costco for a good meal. ”Would you like a free sample?” “Yes, and so would my 12 children, they’re on the other side of the store.” On a good day you can hit all the major food groups along with a cup of juice, vitamins, and finish it all off with a few steaming Dixie cups of freshly brewed coffee.
6. Scruffy is the new sexy:
It’s OK that at one point of the week or another either you or your partner look homeless. Rock that messy hair, razors are expensive, go the all natural route!
Not only has your diet been cut down, but with you’ve got calves like Lance Armstrong now that you have to bike everywhere!
8. You’re a keeper and a saver:
Finally! Dont call it cheap, call it thrifty. You’re making shit happen in your own time. So feel no shame as you scour the racks of clothing from the recently departed! You got this gen y!